Pull that foreskin back, trooper; that’s an order.

c2 men in shower

Watched the first episode of Commando Training on iplayer the other day. Found it quite enlightening, but it didn’t do my heart rate much good by seeing all those naked men standing to attention by their bunks. I might have enjoyed it even more if they ‘d have filmed them first thing in the morning – got my smiley face on here. But the only man who didn’t mind his todger being seen was the one in the shower, illustrating to the group how to execute personal hygiene by pulling back his foreskin to wash it thoroughly.

Now, I gave birth to my 3 kids in the 70’s, and my first two were boys and the first thing the midwife told me was to ease back their foreskin: a) to loosen it: b) hygiene and c) to stop any infection thereby avoiding circumcision. I took her advice and at bath-time, when they were old enough, they did it themselves. Even as babies boys can get an erection and it made sense to me that when the penis disappeared under all that skin, germs and bacteria would be trapped to perhaps incubate an infection. But like all things medical, what goes around comes around. It seems the medical profession are forever changing the way they do things and not always for the better. Take midwifery for instance, in the early 80’s the powers that be decided that women, or men, who wanted to train as midwives had to do their general nursing training first, then specialise. It’s now been changed back.

Whilst I was researching my latest novel which should be out in about two weeks time, I found some very interesting information about sex, todgers and foreskin – note the seamless connection. During WW11 the Wehrmacht set up Army controlled brothels to try and stem the rise in Venereal Disease figures. Even though all men were issued with condoms, they didn’t use them, and if they were discovered to have a dose they were quickly posted to the Eastern Front. I found that one young doctor who tried to get treatment for Gonorrhea from one of his colleagues was shipped off forthwith to a field clearing station on the front line near Stalingrad.

I also found during my research that Army operated brothels were in no way instrumental in reducing Venereal Disease figures during the war. Let me tell you why, but you will find a more comprehensive explanation when reading my next novel A LIFE ONCE HAD – another seamless connection. The soldier, upon entering the brothel is firstly checked for VD and lice. He is then told to wash himself in full view of the brothel attendant and if he didn’t pull back his foreskin he would be told to leave. If he stayed he then had to fill in a form telling his name, rank, and number and the name of the Lady who was about to entertain him. He was then given a condom which had to be handed back at the end of the session. But that was not the end of the process. The soldier had to wash again, pulling back his foreskin, then he was given some ointment to spread over his penis. And, finally an intra-urethral swab was taken. Last, but not least, the condom was examined and if it was found it hadn’t been used then both the soldier and the woman were up on a charge: disciplined. But as my character says in my latest book, who are we to moralise and judge?

I note that the second episode of Commando Training is on tonight, so I have set it to record on my bluray box. Well I haven’t, I can’t work the bloody thing. So to all those servicemen out there – or ex-servicemen if you still have one – just remember to take very good care of your weapon and give it a good oil and polish every day.

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